right now theres opera music playing downstairs..i actually enjoy it ahahhaa very relaxing...oh wait now theres classical music playing hmmmmm...i love the sound of string instruments...yeah im weird and proud of it !  anyways i just wanted to tell everyone that im leaving on the 18th my bad hehehe...its still too soon but oh well .. i wish i can have a couple of more months to say goodbye to family and friends ... but i guess you gotta do what you gotta do ... **sigh** the music is kind of loud now lol...im gonna go downstairs and turn it down...here are some old pics awwww memories

thats about it .. ill post more later bye

EDIT:

well its official...im moving to hawaii...im going to leave WA on june 17th... **sigh**

WOW havent been on xanga for the longest time..!i guess xanga is pretty much DEAD...everyone has converted to my space...life has been kinda crappy and pretty good at the same time...i guess everyone has that combination going on these days...i dont know but people around me has a lot of drama going on... even though we shouldnt have any drama...people are just over dramatic about life in general...feeling sorry for themselves when they dont have to worry about anything...while other people in this world are suffering ...why do they have to be feeling sorry for themselves? maybe people arent telling me whats really going on in their lives... so how can i understand them if we dont talk...most of my friends from school have been distant from me and our group of friends... sometimes i question our friendships ... if its truly a frienship then why are we all so distant .. shouldnt we be there for each other...its not like they are the only ones who are feeling down ... like i havent been depressed as well...ive lost a good amount of friends from the past few months...but the friendships arent lost...ive been praying a lot .. and ive decided to give it time...cause if i truly value our friendships then i should give it time instead of just ending it right now...! thats all i have to say about whats going on in my friends category...

lately ive been feeling lost and confused about my religion...everytime im back on the path i always take a wrong turn and i get lost ... its like i need a navagation system to help me ... i tried talking to other people about this situation but somehow they dont help... i even sometimes get jealous of others for getting closer to God while im sitting on the side watching...ive been going to church my whole life...ive even went to a chuch by myself when i was 9 yrs old...without my parents forcing me to go...maybe im angry at God for all the things that has happened in my life ... but i must look at my life more closely then...cause like the footprints in the sand...i remember a lot of times God has carried me out of  a lot of situations...maybe i should pray more about it...but i would like to thank my cousin heajin for being there for me...youre truly a child of God...and i think of you as my little sister that i never had...who cares if we're only dot blood...cause in my eyes we're are more than that! i would also like to thank my sister for taking me to MOSAIC church in California ... the message cleared my head and opened my eyes to a whole different world...soon ill move down there...maybe i just need a new environment...

1. To sob or shed tears because of grief, sorrow, or pain; weep.
2. To call loudly; shout.
3. To demand or require immediate action or remedy: grievances crying out for redress.

interesting isnt it...ive tried so hard to not cry in front of others cause it shows weakness...thats what i always thought...but i fail at that...cause my emotions always comes out like a waterfall...doesnt matter how big the situation is.. if it just hurts me a tiny bit i would always cry...my siblings tell me im just sensitive with a good heart...dont know about the good heart...cause im always mad at the ones i care about...maybe i should change then ... instead of lashing out at others i should be more kind...**chuckle** if i have ever done that to you .. i either was PMSing..or something might have happened in my life that i dont want to share with the world... but crying sometimes help me to relieve whatever is happening in my life...

**sigh** wow what a very depressing blog ... but sometimes its good to just write it all out ... at least i dont have to bottle it up anymore...now strangers can read what i wrote... 

well heres a video of pics ... when i went to California to visit my sister...i had a great time...cause i got to see my SISTER and SUNNY hehehe! this is the part that is cheerful in this blog.!! ok it doesnt work on xanga ... so heres the link to the video ! enjoy! http://www.youtube.com/w/my-cali-trip?v=ssNe2sfYC1U&search=my%20cali%20trip

WEEZER LYRICS

"My Best Friend"

When everything is wrong I'll come talk to you
You make things alright when I'm feeling blue

You are such a blessing and I wont be messing
with the one thing that brings light to all of my darkness

You're my best friend
and I love you, and I love you
Yes I do

There is no other one that can take your place
I feel happy inside when I see your face
I hope you believe me
Because I speak sincerely
and I mean it when I tell you I need you

You're my best friend
and I love you, and I love you
Yes I do

I'm here right beside you
I will never leave you
and I feel the pain you feel when you start crying

You're my best friend
and I love you, and I love you
Yes I do

You're my best friend
and I love you, and I love you
Yes I do
Yes I do...
Yes I do

EDIT://

people are soo annoying....like the semi trucks that decides to cut you off and stays on the left lane going 50mph ... the annoying teenagers who decides to play loud music or yells at each other right in front of my bedroom window (clearly they dont care about their future since they stay out so late)dont they ever go to school...THEY EFFIN WAKE ME UP AT 2 in the morning when i have to wake up in three hours to go to work!!!! biznatchs...tonight if they do it again im soo gonna call the cops...disrespectful to all of the neighbors...my neighbors are just too scared to say anything...last night i called them jackasses and told them to get the hell away from the neighborhood...they listened ...and came back...grrr! and to the customers who complain about their clothes...but comes back to the store (i swear they do it just to annoy me!) i would also like to complain about the old geezers who owns corvettes or some other expensive cars that only retired people  can afford...just because you own those type of cars doesnt give you the right to ride in the carpool lane (ALONE) and go 50mph...WOW THIS FELT GOOD!!! letting it all out felt really good..**breathe in and out**

well school is starting next week...already sophmore year in college...wow time goes by so fast...hopefully at the end of this year ill get accepted at an art college somewhere in san diego...and ill be able to move at the end of next year...WISH ME LUCK Y'ALL! please pray for me.... thanks to all my friends who was there for me this year ...love you all

STEPHANIE JOANNE AND SARAH WISH YOU LUCK ON YOUR TRANSFERS...ILL PRAY FOR YOU ... HAVE FUN IN CALI ILL BE JOINING YOU SOON! hopefully... 

k that ends my blog entry...here are some pics to entertain you hehehe

me sharon and whitney

me and sharon

my nephew and brother mowing the lawn...like father like son...hehehe